


my past haunts me

by jxnathanbyers



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Depression, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-09
Updated: 2017-03-09
Packaged: 2018-10-01 12:24:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10189844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jxnathanbyers/pseuds/jxnathanbyers
Summary: Mick's feelings post-Chronos.





	

Mick huddles in a corner of the cell; the darkness on the other side of the glass comforting to him. He’s always felt at home in the dark, it’s what makes lighting a match look so beautiful. But alas, there are no matches with him in the cell, just silence and darkness. At the moment, he feels suffocated. It’s like a mask being forced over his head. He gasps and raises his hands to pull off the mask, but there is nothing there. Suddenly there’s a shuffle in the corner and he tenses before recognizing the footsteps.

 

“Len, I can’t breathe,” He gasps out, hands shaky. 

 

He feels so vulnerable, like he’s laid out bare before the man. He half hopes that Leonard will walk away and leave him. There’s just quiet for a few moments and Mick doesn’t think that he can take much more of this deafening silence before a voice says-

 

“You tried to kill us.” 

 

The words sound so soft in the dark with Mick not being able to the see the face who spoke them, but he knows that Leonard probably has an expression of betrayal on his face. He knows that expression well. He’s worn it many times. He shivers slightly then he buries his face in his hands. “They made me. I didn’t want to- at first. I was angry, Leonard. You know that. You left me to die.” 

 

“You’re a killer!” A shout and then the sound of a fist hitting the glass. 

 

Mick jumps at the sound; he had expected Leonard to be angry, of course, but he never could have imagined the full extent of the man’s hatred.  _ Does _ Leonard hate him? Mick could understand why. He had tried to kill them. He had loved it, too, loved the thrill of the chase and the power. And in loving it, he had also hated it. He remembers the Time Masters digging in his head, pulling apart his mind, looking at things they had no right to look at. They had showed him horrible, horrible things. The mission was pointless. It was designed to fail from the beginning. 

 

“You’re a monster.” He can’t tell if it’s his voice or Leonard’s speaking, but the words are true. He’s always been a monster and he’s not sure if he could ever be anything else. 

 

“I’m a monster.” He whispers then he wakes up, cold and in the dark. The dream still haunts him. He can almost remember the sound of Leonard’s voice, but it’s gone now. And so is he. 

 

“Breakfast time!” Ray calls from outside and Mick hears the sound of pots banging.

  
He throws the blankets off and begins to get ready for the day; he begins to get ready to walk and talk among people that he’s sure don’t trust him. If he can live like this and feel so lonely, then is it really a life at all?

**Author's Note:**

> when will the writers acknowledge mick's depression and ptsd?? (also, if you get what the symbolic meaning of having leonard there is, then kudos to you! if not, you can always ask and i'll be happy to explain!)


End file.
